He posts SNSD pictures on his tumblr. Its like a gallery of SNSD, Brown Eyed Girls, 2NE1 and other groups I don't know. I think he's fangirling over the Koren Girl Band Groups like Teddy. How do I feel like Nards? I'm here, spamming pictures to you guys of my latest craze...which is just one Kpop group, SHINee. ._.

I apologize ahead of time to those of you who actually read this blog full of complaints. I am sorry for spamming your newsfeed of pictures of these guys. (._.). I'm warning you, there will also be fanart. Soon. Teddy if you see this, this is all your doing (and your fault! ... okie I'm kidding).

Fun Fact: The oldest member & leader of SHINee is only 20. The youngest member of SHINee is 16.

Labels: 2NE1, BEG, Kpop, SHINee, SNSD, Teddy this is your fault

Key = Diva.
;___; Why Key, WHY?!?!! You're so hot but you're such a divaaa ;___;

Labels: Diva, Key, Kpop, LOL, SHINee

TaeMin: They say YooGeun came here all by himself.
MinHo: Does that many sense? Just think a little.

--

Most of my videos that I favorite-d on youtube are all SHINee related.
This is unhealthy. T_T... but I don't want to stoppppp

Labels: Hello Baby Season 2, I think there's something wrong with me, Kpop, MinHo, SHINee, TaeMin

I checked into my SHINee rehab thing. I was doing well for a while, then I checked out and started to look at Onew everyday. You see, this is unhealthy, but I said that I was going to check back in after I felt better. I felt better, and then I checked back in.

Teddy gave me an idea to draw something SHINee related.
I think I have to check out of SHINee rehab again o_o

I think I have already stated somewhere that Teddy is getting me into KPop and stuff. Of course, you can see my boy craze going on there. Not healthy, but I guess it keeps me sane at times... Anyway. For a while, I've been enjoying some of the music without realizing the lyrics and translation. Once I found Super Junior's Neorago (It's you) video, I noticed it was very sad. I looked up the lyrics and it was sad as well O_O. That goes for the same with SHINee's "Jojo". I think Jojo means Darling or something in Korean, but yeah. This is another break up song! WHY ARE BREAK UP SONGS SO CATCHY. GAWD. I mean, I was even singing it in the car, then I look up the lyrics and i'm like ":| " well, that's a downer. THIS SUCKS.

but yeah... that's my little shpeal about that >_>

Meet Onew ._.
he's still from SHINee with Key and 2 other guys (who have yet to grow on me...soon).
I think I like Onew's voice better than his looks...sometimes. Onew has his days XD...
I named my giant chococat onew...
Actually, wait. I haven't even gotten into SuJu yet LOL
I was doing so well while I was in rehab T-T I'll go back when I feel better...

There's a smile resemblance with Nabi and JinKi Oppa :3

Labels: fangirling, Kpop, Lee JinKi, Nabi, oh God help me, Onew, SHINee

You know what, just stop it. Stop rushing me to finish school. I'm not like you who could advance in science. No. I know you want me to graduate on time, but realize I'M NOT THAT SMART. I work hard with time, not pressure. So just stop it! We all know why I'm doing this, and you know that I don't want to be a fucking nurse. Stop rushing me to apply coz I'm not ready. I have to take the TEAS, and we know how I'm not very good with tests, especially ones that remind me of the SAT. I know you have good intention, but stop rushing me. I wish you could let me do things at my own pace. I know I have wasted a year, but realize I'm rushing to just get everything DONE. And for the last time, I DON'T WANT TO STUDY IN THE PHILIPPINES. SO SHUUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT THAT PLEASE.

And you know what? I'll take this and make it positive. I will do well. I will study so much so I can pass the TEAS, so I don't have to hear you rush me anymore.

--
I kind of wish they said this to me before I went to IMB. Then I could use all that to fuel myself while I was wrestling. Going against 3 other guys scared Kat. But they were impressed the fact that I retaliated. In all honesty, I had no idea what I was doing. I hate ground work. It ain't my thing.

Love is beautiful / love is wonderful

I think, at times, I feel like I want to choke when I hear that. It's a sweet song, and I guess I'm just in a bitter mood. It's kind of hard to digest sweet things with bitterness in your mouth.

I spread these things out so it can help me. I would like to say save me and teach me to not be so attached or clingy. I'm trying hard. Believe me, I am.

Music videos keep me company and I guess it helps with the statement above.

"either way, I think you should let it go for tonight"
"or for the while. Like I said, I can't change his mind. He may think everything is okie now. At my end, it isn't, but I can't do anything about it except vent and scream about it. btw, come back so I can vent and scream to you in person"
"hahaha lol"

KNUCKLING DOWN NOW....
...NOW...

Everything...makes sense now that I have gotten older LOL.

Round 1: Kat

“Why am I wearing this?” Kat asked as she glided her finger tips against her face, looking for her eyes. She couldn’t find her eyes, just only a blindfold to replace her sight. Everything was as dark as night, and she could only hear the deep laughter of two people: her roommates. “Guys, I don’t think I like this game very much…” Kat said as she continued to search for her eyes.

“Oh, Kat, stop worrying. It’s only Marco Polo,” a voice assured her. It sounded like Fabian. Yeah, it’s Fabian…I think… Kat said, skimming over the blindfold. She began to worry a bit, wondering if they were playing a cruel joke on her. It seems to be a continuous routine for the two. “So tell me again why we’re playing Marco Polo in this house?” she asked, as she stretched out her arms, waving them around like a fly was attacking her.

“We’re only having fun,” another voice responded. And that’s Aaron in this direction…Kat thought as she swung her right arm and hit something very hard…which happened to be Aaron’s head.

Kat felt a poke at her rib cage and a squeaked escaped from her mouth. “HEY, I DIDN’T SAY START YET,” Fabian yelled, still poking her rib cage. Kat whined and puckered out her bottom lip. She didn’t want to play this game. This will only end in pain for her, and she knows it.

“’Kay, Kat. Count to 10, and start yelling ‘Marco!’ and we’ll yell ‘Polo!’” Aaron said, lightly shoving Kat. She grumbled, what sounded like “I will kill you,” and “I hope you die.” She made a 180 degree turn, and began counting out loud. The two boys ran different directions, knowing that confusing Kat will be the most fun they will ever get.

--

I'm not the best writer, but I actually kind of miss this D:

I will also attempt to dress a little nicer this year ~_~;
I don't know why.
A part of me thinks that I should be dressing nicer than jeans and shirt everyday.
At least ONE day, I should dress nicer.
Maybe even a skirt.
Or even if I do wear jeans, I could at least wear something nicer on top.
Hm... choices. :|
Wait, that means I actually have to find what I have to wear.
GAAAAH.

I want a blue or black music note JSK from bodyline D: T__T

No Disneyland tomorrow
Which means no Blue Bayou.
*headdesk* I don't want to study anymore.

I'm seeing him today, and I just woke up now.
I don't normally wake up this late. I'm usually up by 8:10 AM.
My body clock used to be regulated to that, but it stopped. I'm not sure what happened. I need to get that back to normal now ,or at least 9AM.

I learned that the sore in my ear is pretty close to my jaw. You know, that little dip that...nevermind. Anyway, it has been hurting there, and I don't know if a lymph node is swelled or something has happened there, coz it HURTS. and I don't get it. I'll ask my dad after I go out today.

I fail at making my own diagnosis. Then again, I'm not going to be a doctor! So I'm fine.

I guess I have a lot on my mind as well, but those come in dreams as well =_=...

Now for some weird personal whatevers:
I think my family is finally coming together. Not my immediate family which includes Mom, Dad and Brother (plus me!). I mean my family, mainly my mom's side. I'm not as close as I would like to be with my family on my Dad's side, but it is very hard to see them since they are all the way in the Philippines. But I digress. I guess our family is something that got teared apart for quite a while. It is managing to repair itself slowly, in which I am glad to see it working. The sky is clearing up slowly after a long typhoon.

I have a list of dolls that I have to make soon.
- Squirrel for April's mom
- Turtle for Abi
- Calcifer (Howl's Moving Castle, Miyazaki version) for Anya.

I actually have a deadline for Calcifer, which is all the way in July before Anime Expo. Although my attendance to the convention is still pending, I told Anya I would make Calcifer for her to compliment her Sophie cosplay.

Which reminds me... if I do go to AX, what the hell will I be wearing?

Anyway-- The turtle for Abi is still in the drawing process. =_= It's a long process to make a turtle... I have to make the prototype before making the actual product to give to her.

...I have the pattern for the Squirrel. I have to make that soon, that way April can give it to her mom.

...Yeah, I make stuff ._. like..dolls and stuff.

"OH OH OH. DO YOU WANT TO GO CANOEING?!"
"Dude, I didn't come to Disneyland to fucking work out."

... I'm not happy about this.

For those of you who do not know me personally or at all, I take pictures. When I am not taking pictures (or studying), I am looking through pictures. It doesn't matter if they're my old pictures or somebody else's gallery, I have to be looking through them. I guess it is a sense of inspiration. Especially when I am looking through my old pictures, I tend to look at how much FUN it was to capture those moments. My cousin calls me the "Queen of Candids" because of the pictures I I take are so midaction or give the feeling of "Wtf? when did you take this?". To be honest I love getting that question. "When did you take this?".

I'm currently cleaning out my flickr account that I had ever since yahoo changed from yahoo photos to flickr. Not fair, right? I had allll my pictures there. It helped for a while until I had my own gallery. As I'm deleting the first 600 or so pictures, I saw the other pictures that I have taken during high school. Amature, yes. I didn't know a THING about photography. All I did was point and shoot. The best tactic with anything, sure. I, personally, call it "aim and fire" but yeah. I stopped using that because it gave people the wrong idea. At least it isn't "shoot & capture"...

To look and delete those pictures would break me in half more than it did with the first 600 pictures. why Why WHy WHY. I don't know why. Within those 6OO was a set of 74 pictures with Aaron and I and I deleted them. think it was more because I know I have them on file here, in my lappy, so I didn't need to worry. But I guess when I started deleteing things that I knew that I had 'em backed up, but still loved, it became more painful to detele. I think I just answered my own question. Wonderful. It bothers me. The fact that those pictures were taken during high school. My fun times, without having a care in the world and just living. Or, at least that's how I saw it during the time. We all looked so young, just taking picture after picture and laughing at every joke. It almost sounds like "Sweet Disposition" by the Temper Trap. My friends. My very dear and best friends. A group of us. Before we all started breaking apart and going our seperate ways. Before anatomy, college applications, and relationships. Before we started drifting further apart. I'm confused. I should be fine the fact that I still get to see them. Maybe I feel weird saying this. I love them all dearly. But... why do I feel like something is wrong? It's almost that same feeling I had when I didn't really talk to my elementary/middle school group for a while (I went a Catholic school for 9 years. I had the best friend and same group of friends for 9 years). It seems like it has switched or something. I am very well aware that feelings are not complete fact, but I can not help how I feel. I don't know. I think I'm overthinking again. It will pass.

Pictures from end 2005 to end 2006 are precious to me.
These pictures were what used to be before everything in my life, family and friends, started to change.

So what now with Photography? Two years later, during my seniory year, I took a photography class. Fun, yes. I got to take & develop pictures traditionally. It was great. But nowadays, its just seems like a chore or maybe I am trying to hard to be a photographer by establishing photoshoots.Pose here. Take a picture here. Smile for the camera. It seems like if I'm not in a certain setting, I start to resist. Like, if I'm forced to. I think part of me also resists on becoming a professional. And I just realize, I redeemed that setting during my Family's Christmas party. The best setting to be in since...2005.

I'm here again. I'm sitting with 5 cameras I have owned through the years. My old automatic film camera made by Olympus. I remember asking for one, and for my grandmother to be cured from cancer. I was in the 6th grade and I only got the camera. My 8.1 Sony Cybershot with a cracked screen and a missing battery charger. I got that during my junior year of high school. My Canon 40D EOS. The camera I should be using more, but refuse until I get a smaller lens. Or...unless there's a big family party. It's a big hit, if people know how to use it. The boys (Kevin, Mark and Cano) love the sports mode. I now have a Nikon Coolpix (I forgot what model) that is 10.0 megapixle. I got this for Christmas, and I wasn't even asking for a camera. I wanted a new lens (which I am saving for now...). Mama bought it for me and said she got it for a great price. I looked at it. It's red and very thin. I'm just afraid if I drop it, it will break. Even though I have a new camera, I still remain faithful to my old 7.2 Megapixle Sony Cybershot. It was never personally given to me. It was the "family's digital camera" but I wanted to bring it everywhere. And I did. It fell from many heights, it survived water damage. Hell, if I press down halfway, the screen makes these weird lines. Old, yes, but it has been extremely reliable. Everyone knew it as "my camera". It has been there with me since 2004. It was bought for $200 or so. I'll try out the Nikon, but I'm not giving up that Sony until it dies.

With less figurative language, I shall ease the weird tenseness.
I WANT KIMI NI TODOKE CHAPTER 29 TO BE OUT NOW.
I WANT KUROSHITSUJI'S CHAPTER 42 TO BE OUT NOW.
MANGA IS SO ADDICTING, IT IS NOT EVEN FUNNY.
Which reminds me, I have to keep up with Hetalia.
*fail*

Plankton: GOODBYE EVERYONE, I'LL REMEMBER YOU ALL IN THERAPY.

GOOD BYE. I WILL COMPLAIN LATER ABOUT EVERYTHING AND ANYTHING.

Labels: cameras, confused, I'm hungry, manga, nostalgia, photography, pictures, stream of consciousness

I feel bad for people who actually read this blog.

Like I said many times before. all I do is complain, remember conversations that I have remembered from the past, type down random quotes that have been said through out the day, week or month, talk about what happened today, and mention how much I miss him.

I'm sorry if I am totally spamming your feed.

I really do complain a lot.

Also, I would like to add that my brother is now on facebook.
I must say, I am glad he isn't spamming my wall with internet memes that he and I know.

Labels: apology, my brother is funny

Brother: Jason (brother's friend) is in a long distance relationship with one of our old friends.

Kat: Is his girlfriend halfway across the world?

Dad: We did that.

Kat: Yes yesss. I know this story.

Dad: But I guess your generation has it easier now since you have IM, and internet, and webcam. You guys don't need to wait for letters or anything.

Kat: It's still hard. It isn't the same when that person isn't right next to you.

Erg, so this hurts a lot. x_x I could probably name every muscle that hurts right now, but that would take too long because there are way too many muscles in the human body.
Actually, there are too many bones in the human body, but I will save that for another lesson.
I'll be stretching a lot after I eat dinner. If I stretch now, and my mother calls me to dinner, I will probably be in some weird position where I can't seem to move my leg away from my head. Of course, the way I stretch is never that intense, but I always was able to do 'em thanks to ballet.

I think if it weren't for those intense and flexible stretching every 30 minutes before ballet, I wouldn't be as flexible as I am now. I mean, my size is huge. I complete the image of a shape of a pear and an apple put together. Kind of to be very fortunate to actually stretch that much actually. Then again, after I stopped doing ballet, I couldn't reach the tip of my toes to my head, and I couldn't even let my stomach muscles hold me up for a long time. Let alone for a whole second. But, thankfully, I am still able to stretch well! *kind of lost her train of thought*

Labels: stream of consciousness

I got a big "Welcome back to IMB" from the people I know. Except, it was more like "Where have you been?"
"School, Sifu."
"What? School?"
"Yeah Sifu. My class ended at 4:45PM."
"Ah. We missed you at the Christmas Party."
"...There was a Christmas Party?"

Kevin Gin's hair grew. A lot.
Kevin's (I forget is last name) has hair!
John is still teaching the kids class.
The girls I usually talk to are not there.

Where have I been?

Right. My being a hermit in my room for a good...hmm... 2 months studying. A lot.
Joy.

Well, Vince taught, and I felt even more out of shape than ever. Seriously. At least it wasn't as asthma inducing as his other work-outs. I had to sit out for a bit (I feel bad for Kevin...er, not Kevin Gin, other Kevin) and then come back it. Heart rate wouldn't go down as fast as it should. Need to work on my cardio better :\ and breathe better. I NEED TO BREATHE.

I feel tired, but I want to convince myself that it is a good tired. It's a start to my resolutions to work out more and... get back to a size 14 in my jeans -_-. Or, maybe even smaller. WE'LL SEE HOW THIS ALL WORKS OUT FIRST. I hope to really keep to my word this time. This a good sore, even though I'm going to groaning in the morning, rolling over because I am so sore. I will get used to it. And I will bring my breathing/cardiorespiratory back! YAY NUTRITION.

Okie, I'm going to go write some notes for my class... *hermits once again*

"In Korakuen amusement park there is this wall where young couples can attach locks as a symbol of their affection for each other. I've seen similar things like this in other countries but it amuses me that the symbol of a lock may conjure up a different image when they have been married for ten years. Maybe I'm just being cynical :)"

Words from the photographer.

I think if I keep typing about my dad and how angry he makes me, I will eventually break Lappy's keyboard as well as its hard drive.

Fall 2010 tentative class choices(application time!)
Microbiology
Psychology 16
Poli Sci 1 Honors
Chem 21 B (tentative) <-- if I can handle two science courses & if I decide to go to Long Beach and San Diego State

Spring 2011 (results)
Biology 10
Astronomy Honors
???
????
???????
For spring, I have no idea what I want to do.

Labels: panic mode, planning too far ahead, scared

I just realized that I am taking the wrong class.
Apparently I need Psych 16 if I want to go to Mt. St. Mary's College.
And Child Development only applies to San Diego State. WHICH IS IN SERIOUS CONSIDERATION, AND AT THE BOTTOM OF MY LIST.
WHAT HAVE I DOOONNNEEE.
Oh well. GE!

Mom says that men go through a sort of menopause, in which they call "andropause".
I really think dad is going through that, coz he's been bitching for weeks now...

You don't need to keep calling everything "asian" to sound cool.
Waking up and staying on the computer all day and drinking coffee isn't asian. To some people, that's just everyday =___=

The cool part about is that I got to see the sunrise as I drove.
It was my first time watching it. Ever.

1. STOP EATING SO DAMN MUCH
2. Work out more D: This gut wasn't here when I started Fall Semester....
3. Speak up a little more about how I feel
4. STOP BEING SO DAMN CLINGY :(
5. Remind self that there is ENOUGH TIME IN THE WORLD, SO STOP FREAKING OUT.
6. Be happy & smile from the heart more. :) [which reminds me I should prolly meditate more...]

I'm trying to take my mind off of today by looking up pictures of Key. But Key can never replace him (even though Key is the same age as him, but taller and Korean and blah blah blah blah blah...). Also I'm listening to "Noona, you're so pretty (Replay)", but it doesn't help that Noona means older girl. *headdesk &changes song to Merry-Go-Round* You think this would be a lot easier since this is the second time he's leaving. But to be honest, it's a lot harder than the first.

Last night was pretty fun. A last minute moment with Krisette, April and I, but it was fun. I will prolly stop eating at BJ's for a while, considering that I feel like throwing up right now T_T. Oh well... Anyway, this is the first time I actually organized a last minute shindig with my friends. I think Im' glad that I did that because April was going to leave to UCLA today and I start Winter Session soon. We ate a lot of food (*pukes*), but it was good food, don't get me wrong! It was just a lot. We talked a lot, and explained to Krisette about our Korean obsession. Showed April Steve Terada and Key to Krisette. We laughed a lot, but now I can't remember why we were laughing. You can tell that this is getting pretty bad LOL. We also went to visit Shaun, and watched a little bit of Ni Hao Kai Lan and "Up". It was nice seeing him and his brother&sister. His brother is so violent! :( he kept hitting me. At least his sister is the good one. After that, April and I went for a much needed Pinkberry run. I was surpised that they didn't charge us tax O_O. But yeah. Then I drove April home, then I went home before 10 (FOR THE FIRST TIME THIS WEEK).

Yesterday was fun. I'm glad I got to see some of my friends before they went back to school.
Btw, did I mention that I ran into Steve, Abi, Sean, Ben & Sam at the mall? Yes, I did! It was great seeing them all (ESPECIALLY YOU, ABI. I KNOW YOU'RE READING THIS).

Now to continue listening to SHINee keep my mind off of this move. :(
If only there was a restraint on my hands and fingers so I won't text him. Then maybe this wouldn't be so hard =_=

Meet Key.
I like Key.
I like Key as much as I like Steve Terada.
I like Key almost more than Steve Terada.
This is really bad LOOOOL

1. I hope Steve Terada will reply back to my tweet to him LOOOOOL. I'm not crazy T_T