k: Do you still want to stay together?
a: What kind of question is that?
k: I was only asking...
--

I'm not ready for this, only because I fear it. I knew from the start that we were going to face some difficulties, and I knew that distance was going to be one of them. I think its because I hear a lot of stories that these sort of things don't work out because the two of your are so far apart. I shouldn't compare my relationship with anyone else's, but you can't help it sometimes. I ask myself, "If Mama and Papa can endure 10 years of letters and visits every two years, how come I can't handle a few months?" He says that he'll try to come one or two weeks interval. He even said he was reserving a day just for me. I felt very bad after that. I mean, its really sweet of him to do that, but I keep thinking about school first. I'm so...scared about this semester, just because its Anatomy and I'm TERRIFIED because its so hard. It took me two days to memorize the human body's anterior regional names, and I haven't even moved onto the posterior, the human cell, and tissue. I still have a long way to go, and I have my first quiz on the first three chapters as well as a quiz on the microscope that day too. Like I said, terrified. I want to put a lot of time into Anatomy. I guess I also don't want to be yelled at for spending way too much time with my significant other. I felt like we didn't maximize our summer time together, even if it was juts once a week for a few hours. Even he said that we don't spend enough time together. In the long run... I know I have to put school first.

There is always something that I have noticed in myself when I'm with him (or even when I was just friends with him) and its that I shouldn't expect a lot from him.