Monday, October 25, 2010
It's one of those nights again. For the second time this month I dyed my hair and it looks black. It's actually dark purple, but oh well, this is what I do when I'm sad. I don't want to talk about school because I'm struggling. I have Banana milk with me right now, and I'm hoping this will make me feel a little better. I kind of wish Eddie didn't change his profile picture where he is in it. God Damnit. I found the wonders of concealer to hide my dark circles. Now you can't tell if I've been crying or pulling all nighters! Ahaha, I am brilliant no I'm not. Anyway... Banana Milk and "Nothing Better" sung by Kim JongHyun. And there went my banana milk. I should have bought more coffee milk. That stuff is awesome. Maybe I'll stop by Freshia on the way home tomorrow to buy it.

At least I'm not scared to go to sleep this time. I just hate the dream where I take him back. Possibly because that is the last thing I would like to do and he is probably the last person I would like to see right now. Wow, I am really hurt over this now that I think about it. I am caring about this more than I really should be. It's kind of ridiculous, but I guess I have every right to feel this way? I don't know, it's going to be a month since the incident. Did I make the right choice in exchanging Masquerade Ball with FTC? Then again, I won't be on their campus now will I? I feel mean having a certain hate bias towards UCSD only because he goes there, but what can I do? My mind changed about them when I met some people from CKI south, but yeah.

My parents keep asking what I want. I told them external hard drive, but in all honesty, I just want to feel better.
posted by Kat at 11:15 PM |

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