Tuesday, March 9, 2010
I was literally running after eating lunch with Cohleen today. I thought I was going to be late, but I ended up being there... while everyone was waiting to go in? I saw Alex and immediately went to him, considering he was probably the only person I knew in that club. I am willing to make more friends this semester...

I was reunited with Lisa after a year and a half of not seeing each other. She was in my English IA Honors class last year during Fall. It was so nice and refreshing to see a friendly face there and the fact that she still remembered me. Then again, we kept in touch through deviantART and now facebook. Now, I'll be seeing her more and more.

Everyone seems nice, even though I just met one person. I'm already filling out an application for a board position (already?? Well, they need a historian. I never got Historian while I was in band, might as well try this out). My only concern about this club is that I'm not sure if I can make it to all the events. I hope I can though. I would really like to. I think I'll try to get platoon leader as well. Maybe. (Haha, platoon leader).
Now how does this make me feel??
Well, I don't know. A part of me feels like I am taking on more than I cans handle and maybe I'm going crazy. Why is that? I don't know I know this familiar anxiety that I started going for many things coz I wanted to keep my mind busy. Very busy. This familiar anxiety reminds me of when Aaron and I broke up and I started going for all these positions-- Senior Class Historian, Yearbook, Drum Major, Fine Arts VP, and I think at some point I wanted to take all AP classes. Yeah... you start doing thinsg when your mind (and possible mental state...if present at the moment), is kind of unstable. I did all those things to forget about him. And now I'm doing all these things so whatever is bothering about me and him will just...not...be...in my head. Just to keep myself busy when he's busy, I guess. At the same time I feel kind of bad. Why? I don't know. Maybe because I am only thinking about myself at the moment. But if I think about it...I need this club for brownie points for Nursing school too... eck. I hate being me...

Did I mention I screwed up my knees again? I...prolly shouldn't haven't took all my frustration and disappointment and what ever the hell has been inside me and just took out on the pad.
Steve noticed and I told him that Iw as angry and I haven't slept in a while and all...whatever I just said up there. He told me to take it easy and...not...hurt my partner. He, then, proceeded to go to my partner and say "SHE'S IN A BAD MOOD. TRY NOT TO PISS HER OFF ANYMORE THAN SHE ALREADY IS". Thanks, Steve -_-.
posted by Kat at 4:56 PM |